My faith confronts my biases, evidence of its activation.
I told my coworker about my family. "My mom and sisters are in North Carolina," I recounted. "My mom is also raising my young cousin." I could tell that my last remark piqued intrigue. I explained, "Her parents live with addiction. They just couldn't get it together."
As soon as the words left my mouth, they choked my consciousness.
Despite my immersion in service to those who are traditionally underserved, I was confronted by the truth that I believe individuals living with addiction lack the willpower (strength) to order their lives. My academic training and work experience have taught me that addiction is a disease - in importance and requirements for care like cancer, diabetes, and the like. And even still, I harbored a deep belief about how it worked - and this belief was likely influencing my decision-making whenever I had to be adjacent to addiction in any form.
I repented.
****
I awoke in the middle of the night and couldn't return to sleep. At 4:30am, my doorbell rang. Shaken, I checked the security camera. A woman under the influence of something jiggled our door's lock, rang the bell, and waved at the camera when it lit up. For the next two days, I couldn't sleep. I prayed that God would free me from the fear that something far more sinister would happen to my family in the coming days.
Finally, revelation. I heard God say, "She was never a threat to you. She rang your doorbell for help." I knew then that I was to exact authority. I prayed - better yet, commanded - that she would be arrested by the Holy Spirit during her incarceration. I prayed that she would be freed from addiction. I prayed that she would be reconciled to her family. I felt a deep release after my prayer.
I've slept well every night since.
****
We spoke with my cousin's mother recently. She's doing well - appearing to have settled into life free from addiction. We pray for reconciliation and restoration.
I pray for my heart to receive more truth, and for my faith to be thrust into action for improving how we exemplify the Spirit of Jesus in our work, relationships, and stewardship of the world we curate.
