Upon reading "Four Things Women Want From A Man", I've added to my understanding of peace. The author of the guide, Dr. A.R. Bernard - one of my favorite teachers -, notes that we experience peace when our values line up with our actions. For example, the humanitarian is most satisfied (i.e. content and whole) when engaged in community service because it aligns with her value of "Service to Others".
The teaching in the book led me to realize that we battle people by attacking their activities, when in fact we're up against what we perceive to be an erroneous value system (i.e. values that differ from our personal or cultural standards). People who appear to be in error may express little remorse or are resistant to change certain behaviors because the behaviors align with values they hold near. For example, the man who rejects advances from a beautiful and kind woman in favor of staying with and providing for his bitter wife may do so because he values Duty above Delight.
Earlier this week, I conducted some introspective exercises in order to pull out my personal values. I asked myself, "when have you been the most content, satisfied, and happy?" My first jolt came from identifying the fact that I am most content when I am free. My most prized value is Freedom. The other values I hold near are Excellence, Diplomacy, Equity/Justice, Legacy, Diversity, Integrity/Honor, Peace, Hope, and Risk. I mapped these values with my current activities, future goals, and long-standing dreams.
As I contemplated and mulled, I found that there were a few more values that were poking through my current life experience. These values and associated activities don't currently bring any peace but are areas in my life where I'd like to grow. I identified Thankfulness, Intimacy, Obedience, Health, and Fidelity as areas for further enlightenment and improvement. Currently, Obedience bucks up against my value for Freedom - hence all the (unrighteous) rebellion I've exhibited recently.
I asked God why couldn't I just abandon Obedience in favor of Freedom, and He said it's because I'm being conformed into the image of His son. The conformity requires an understanding of and alignment with the values of the Kingdom including Holy Obedience unto God and His leading.
In 2017, I aim to target and cultivate peace in my life by 1) marking my days with activities and meditation that aligns with my values and 2) chasing the uncomfortable areas - those values that currently bring no peace and still need development - until I come to a full understanding of the importance of those values for my life and relationships today, my purpose tomorrow, and God's Kingdom always.
Happy New Year Everyone!
